i could really use a back massage. i think my shoulders are too tense.

So i guess it's about time for an update; i haven't blogged in a while.
first off, i now has a job - i'm working at winners. this is very exciting. because, of course, i've never had a real job before. so i get to learn the ropes and such at last.
[sigh] my happygolucky teenage days are almost over... what a real shame. i must now assume a responsible posture, careful attitude, and a hopeless demeanor, and wear my corsets UNDER my clothes. fml.
and i has a boyfriend - but you knew about that one already, if you've been reading my blog for any decent length of time. but i can't help adding him into this post, because it's a life update post. and he's in my life. so if you don't want to hear about him anymore, you'll just have to suck it up and read on. or stop reading. either way, i don't care. i mean, i would rather you stuck around and read my blog [the more readers, the better, right?] but if you really want to leave, you can. of course, that begs the question, why would you really want to leave? i'm charming, witty, beautiful, and oh-so-smart! - and clearly, full of myself. [awkward silence] ... no. i'm kidding. but do please stick around. i like to be read.
i SERIOUSLY gothed up for church yesterday - spiked my hair, did black eyeliner, black lips, black tanktop-corset-skirt combo, along with my burgundy Docs and my black fishnet arm-thingers, and my coffin-shaped backpack... now this is church, mind you. god and worship and tithe and all. ... but does anyone blink an eye? - N0, not a chance! they say how much they like my outfit, is what they do! i'm not a social outcast for being different, and it's awesome! i seriously fucking love my church, and my God! - and yes, i know swearing is frowned upon by christians everywhere, but I say, STFU. because God likes it best when we're honest. and when i swear, i'm honestly saying exactly what i mean. i don't throw in an f-word every second word, just when i'm in the middle of some extreme emotion. so there. and it's true. i fucking love God. cos he's just amazing.
.... aaaand moving right along.
my phone is dying on me by inches; the vibrate function's almost completely gone, and sometimes it makes really funny buzzy noises instead of actually buzzing the phone itself, and sometimes it cuts out altogether. and today when i was trying to send a text to my bf, it shut itself off randomly. i was like, WTF?!?! because it shouldn't be doing that. however, it IS about three years old now. so i guess it's not that unusual.
facebook made me stay off it for about six hours this evening, too. i was pissed. it said i couldn't access my account because of site maintenance. if you ask me, i say that's BS-speak for, "there's something wrong but we don't know how to fix it in five minutes or less. so we're going to try to work it out before you notice something's wrong, and when you do notice, we'll do our best to make it look like yours isn't the only one that there's something going wrong with." but now i'm happily back on facecrack facebook. so.
um - yeah. i guess that's about it. that was a pretty long post. kudos if you made it all the way through. and <3 <3 <3 to my boyfriend :)

Cable Car

Emotive unstable you're like an unwinding cable car
Listening for voices, but it's the choices that make us who we are
Go your own way, even seasons have changed just burn those new leaves over
So self-absorbed you've seemed to ignore the prayers that have already come about

This is the correlation of salvation and love
(Don't drop your arms)
Don't drop your arms, I'll guard your heart
With quiet words I'll lead you in

La lalalala, la la la, la lala, la
La lalalala, la la la, la lala, la

Backing away from the problem of pain you never had a home
You've been misguided, you're hiding in shadows for so very long
Don't you believe that you've been deceived that you're no better than...
The hair in your eyes, it never disguised what you're really thinking of

This is the correlation of salvation and love
(Don't drop your arms)
Don't drop your arms, I'll guard your heart
With quiet words I'll lead you in

This is the correlation of salvation and love
(Don't drop your arms)
Don't drop your arms, I'll guard your heart
With quiet words I'll lead you in

You're so brilliant, don't soon forget
You're so brilliant, grace marked your heart
You're so brilliant, don't soon forget
You're so brilliant, grace marked your heart
You're so brilliant (This is the correlation)
Don't soon forget (Between salvation and love, don't drop your arms)
You're so brilliant (I'll guard your heart)
Grace marked your heart (With quiet words I'll lead you in and out of the dark)

La lalalala, la la la, la lala, la
(Don't drop your arms)
La lalalala, la la la, la lala, la

This is the correlation of salvation and love (La lalalala, la la la, la lala, la)
(Don't drop your arms)
Don't drop your arms, I'll guard your heart (La lalalala, la la la, la lala, la)
With quiet words I'll lead you in

This is the correlation of salvation and love (La lalalala, la la la, la lala, la)
(Don't drop your arms)
Don't drop your arms, I'll guard your heart (La lalalala, la la la, la lala, la)
With quiet words I'll lead you in
-- Anberlin, The Unwinding Cable Car

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i'm in a bit of a contemplative mood tonight, hence the blogging, despite being as pissed off as it's possible to be at facebook's photo uploader on whose account i had to restart the computer once, log off twice, and upload about 25 pictures 5 at a time. argh. waste of time.

anyhow. i suspect the mood is due to either listening to anberlin - who i find very calming and thoughtful - or a serious lack of sleep: and possibly it's due to a combination of both. anyhow.
so, as i said, i've recently been listening to anberlin; and i've tried the goo goo dolls recently too - i'm not sure if i'm a fan of them yet, i have so many of their songs and i don't know the songs at all besides iris, so it's hard to tell if i like them or not.

anberlin i like though. thanks go out to cory isaak for being a fan and pointing me in their direction. you were right, dude, they are good.

we had the beat cafe last night at school, and i read the poem from the last post instead of my notebook - i've lost it somewhere. maybe i left it at school. i also sang iris by the ggd as mentioned above.

i'm also feeling quite proud of myself: i went for a run today during second block at school. it was only my second run ever since grade 10 p.e., so i'm really happy with myself. i hate running, but the exercise feels good. and the first run since grade 10 was also this year, about a month ago. hehe. ^-^; and i have a date with O. for a run on tuesday during second block - don't forget your running clothes, my friend! - and i'll be sure to remember my deodorant this time ^_^

oh and speaking of running and deodorant and such, how's the heat outside? that's right, it's been sunny! can you believe that? after all the rain we had, suddenly we're up at 27-29 degrees! it's awesome! and i was sweating like a pig while i was running. XD

anyways, i'm off for an early bedtime. toodles people. <3

your face!

your facebook, that is.
i'm not addicted to face crack book, really i'm not.
i'm just on there every day, yeah, that's it. just on there every day. nothing to worry about.
i mean, it's not like i don't have a life, yeah. a life. i can have a life outside of the white-and-blue face network, i can, really.
i just - connect with people on there. yeah.
i can tell them about stuff, and see their stuff. and see those pictures they promised to send to me from that party last year.
facebook.
i'm not addicted!